it's a saturday morning and i lie in bed feeling exhausted. yet, i'm now so used to waking up early for work, can't seem to go back to sleep. exhausted because i left the office at 8.45pm. had dinner at the gardens at 9pm with colleagues. got home at 10.30pm. on a usual working day, i'll be asleep by 11pm. work is that demanding and tiring, but i hate to say, i'm enjoying it. i'm not a workaholic. never was, never will... 

the learning curve has been great, the people are nice, i can't ask for more. met some interesting people with great minds and it makes work much interesting. 

2009 is soon coming to an end already. funnily enough, foong mei still finds 2007 to be the happiest. don't ask me what happened after 2007 because i can't remember, it was that forgettable.

2 more months ahead and i truly hope to end 2009 with a high note. at least in work.

i remembered how it was like two years ago and it hit me, it was painful. it still is... but it's nice to know someone's happy.

this is how it should be.. i guess.



Lord, lead and hold me through these 3 months ahead because I don't know what lies ahead as what lies after this 3 month period is so uncertain and daunting.

Ok, september's coming to an end and time flies so quickly and i can see christmas already. I have plenty to be grateful for the time of idleness at home. Extremely thankful for the financial support from my daddy because foong mei spends a lot.. well, technically once i start working, he will still be supporting me because i'm only an intern :(

Something went on last weekend, and it was a great experience. fun-filled and it got me to reflect and be thankful..

so i'm going to complete my sentence here that i didn't finish during the sharing,

I thank God for bringing me home because I wouldn't have learned so much from this one person who shared and shaped me to become the person I am today, appreciate home this much and thank God for this idle time because I wouldn't be able to spend time with people i love and wouldn't have time to just be still and know that all these blessings come from the Almighty.

September is a special month, at least to me. For the past two years, I left home for UK in september and I can tell you the exact dates without looking at my passport.

20th sept 2007 and 21st sept 2008. not leaving this year though..

but september is still a special month...

can't wait to start working.. at least then i'd feel slightly more productive.

it's hard when all your thoughts are so wild at 4am in the morning. only to realise, it shouldn't be this way.

⁹But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me.


so who can be against us?

i like catching up with the news. reading newspapers, blogs, watching news on tv.

but come business news, i'm totally clueless. however, i'm now finding myself reading and googling them on the net because i have a few interviews to attend. and though these companies are very much talked about, i never knew what they actually do.

business talk. it's something completely new.

seriously, i'm far too young for this.

received 2 surat cinta from dbkl in 1.5 months, both worth RM100. and when i finally made some effort to pay off my tickets, they actually commented about my attire.

what!

tidak boleh memakai selipar and seluar pendek.

seriously? i thought the fella was just kidding. remind me again what country am i living in?

“To tell a story, or to hear a story told, is not a simple transmission of information. Something else in the telling is given too, so that,
once hearing, what one has heard becomes a part of oneself.”

- Susan Griffin (A Chorus of Stones), 1992


how often do stories of others becomes a part of you?

I don't know which is worse,

feeling to crap due to PMS or feeling like i'm a retired old woman.

T.T

My parents think it is a good idea to drive up to penang to stay and for food. And then drive to Hat Yai to stay and for more food and shopping. And then go back to penang to stay. And drive to ipoh for MORE food and come home.

WTH!

I told them I had enough of traveling around and enough of going around but they answered me in a very disinterested manner, this time, we're driving! But that's not the point! Hello??! ZOMG.

If penang looks like montmartre, then MAYBE i'll consider, but.... in reality..... T.T

I'm going to stuff myself crazy with food. >.<

It's been a week since graduation, since I stepped my foot again on this land. It's been almost 3 months of absolute idleness. No work, no stress, nothing. Just pigging out everyday I'd say, lo and behold, shopping in KL? Nope, I'm no longer interested. What happened to me??!! I'd like to think once the haze clears up, activities might start picking up again but I highly doubt that the haze situation is going to clear up anytime soon.

i think i have had enough of flying for the next half of the year. it's amazing how people can stand the hussle to get to the airport, check in, get through custom check which is totally annoying, wait at least 2 hours to board the flight, and then sit in the plane for X amount of hours. don't even get me started on having luggages and having to be careful on how much liquid i have in my hand luggage. no wonder people get so tired and exhausted after the whole ordeal and sleep through their flights... and then end up having jet lag. well unless if you're loaded with money, you'll get the creme de la creme service - business or even better, first class seats. at the end of my 12 hour flights to/from europe, not only am i tired, i feel like i'm the dirtiest person on the planet. doesn't help if some passengers on board smell like they haven't had a good scrub in 24 hours. the least one can do on board is to brush his teeth after each meal and have a bit of decency of using some deodorant.

toilets. public toilets are pretty disgusting in paris i have to say. but hey on air asia X the level of cleanliness in the toilets were seriously.. unimpressive just because certain male passenger(s) just cannot aim properly. it's either they were unable OR just can't be bothered to lift the toilet seat up because they do not have women in their house OR they were half asleep. I was left totally speechless after stepping into the small space which smells of ammonia and then locking the door when the little space lit up. to my horror.. the mess these people created was as if a few boys were urinating together!! AND the best part is.. air asia X does not provide toilet seat covers, although on the right hand side of the toilet there was a compartment for it. how much do they actually cost, really? 

airline food. how often and how much can you have them? i can't understand how they are made and stored but some airline food are not bad at all. everyone has their own stories about airline food but i need to say this. you know how it feels like to have to sit in one spot for hours and hours and not have any freedom to move about, the only thing that could break the routine was to have a nice meal on board. this time was my first on air asia X and i was keen to have malaysian meal because i love nasi lemak. but to my horror once again, i was again disappointed with the airline. i paid quite a lot for a ticket from stansted to LCC and the food was priced at £7 if i'm not mistaken for two meals - nasi briyani and nasi lemak. okay if you ask me £3.50 for each meal with a small bottle of spritzer, still cheaper than any dodgy takeaways in london. BUT the problem is.. why are things priced so differently in the menu? in MYR it's only 36.00. but in GBP it was £7.00 x 6 = MYR42.00. see the difference? and the rice was SOAKED in oil. i couldn't help and took pictures of it. with disgust.

lastly, i bought 20kgs or baggage allowance for both my mum and i. in total, 40kgs. one bag weighed only 14kgs, while the other was 22kgs. in total it was only 34kgs who in the right mind would charge £10 for that extra 2kgs while i still have 6kgs of allowance for the other bag? i swear no airline would ask for money for 2kgs of overweight items when i still have 6kgs of allowance. and how dare you say, £10 is not alot of money? are you kidding me? for this reason i would choose MAS hands down. my luggage was overweight by 8kgs the last time i was on board with MAS and they didn't request a penny from me....

le sigh. paid GBP 740+ for two and totally regretted.

The highlight of the past 11 days was the amount of time my mum and i spent on traveling from one place to another, NOT the graduation ceremony. I was completely exhausted come the ceremony and just couldn't be bothered to take any more pictures whatsoever. Have to say though, the traveling part was not at all easy but very, very enjoyable although my mother would cringe at the sight of me using money to buy things. EVERYTHING is expensive in europe. Nothing is cheap or free in that part of the world but hey that place is really so beautiful alright! Am so thankful for the opportunities and I promised myself, one day, I'd do more traveling in europe - with more comfort. My poor feet really deserve some me-time.

been listening to a lot of MJ's songs for 2 days. do you realise most of the lyrics he wrote was to advocate change in the ways we live for the next generation and how we all play a part to make the earth a better place.

how inspiring!

Today has been something. Was looking forward to this day because i haven't met miss rachel puan and I MISSSS herrr gigglesssss soooooo muchhhhh. Little did I know... I woke up to find out Michael Jackson passed away. sigh.

I remembered as i was growing up, my auntie would play the jackson 5 album all the time and i can now still vividly remember the cover of that album. It was little MJ with afro hair on the cover. Grew up listening to Heal the world... make it a better place... for you and for me and the entire human race...

I can't remember how many times we were made to sing that song, and everytime i listen to it, i get chills. good chills. =) MJ was never my favourite idol or what not.. but he was the world's icon. may he finally rest in peace he deserved.

anyhoos.. rach bough me freddos! ahhhh... my love for freddos have been rekindled! =) had sooo much fun catching up with each other and with jamie.. hahahaha! what a day today.. it was like we never left for uk and australia. just like the old times. talking and asking silly questions are her expertise and thats what i love about!

so many people had so much to say about my faith. some would say, its blind faith, others think why so much faith? or so little?

i don't know. because i'm a human being with doubts and weaknesses just like anyone. how distrusting or unfaithful i am to have my own opinions. why do christians always have a say about what others faith are like, or how little others trust God, or how little they serve and contribute, how this person doesn't go to church therefore he is not doing the right thing, or worse, how little they know about 'being a christian', and how little they know about the Word. how annoying!

my relationship with my God may not be the 'perfect relationship' but that is what this journey is about. what i can't stand is how everyone seem to have an opinion on how this relationship should be and ought to be. why do they care so much.. i go at my own pace, you go on your own. what is the hurry? where i am at right now, is where God brought me..

if they think i am sinning and dishonouring God then.. so be it. because God knows my heart and knows who i truly am.

this is why i find christianity so challenging, why can't christians just let each other be?

why still argue about christians should not swear, should not behave in this manner, should not doubt, and the other shoulds and should nots. where is the grace which God gave us?

don't agree?
then don't lah.

the book of ecclesiastes is beautifully written and carried so much grace which i find so much comfort in.

¹ There is a time for everything,
       and a season for every activity under heaven:

 ² a time to be born and a time to die,
       a time to plant and a time to uproot,

 ³ a time to kill and a time to heal,
       a time to tear down and a time to build,

 ⁴ a time to weep and a time to laugh,
       a time to mourn and a time to dance,

 ⁵ a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them,
       a time to embrace and a time to refrain,

 ⁶ a time to search and a time to give up,
       a time to keep and a time to throw away,

 ⁷ a time to tear and a time to mend,
       a time to be silent and a time to speak,

 ⁸ a time to love and a time to hate,
       a time for war and a time for peace.

 ⁹ What does the worker gain from his toil? ¹⁰ I have seen the burden God has laid on men. ¹¹ He has made everything beautiful in its time. He has also set eternity in the hearts of men; yet they cannot fathom what God has done from beginning to end. ¹² I know that there is nothing better for men than to be happy and do good while they live. ¹³ That everyone may eat and drink, and find satisfaction in all his toil—this is the gift of God. ¹⁴ I know that everything God does will endure forever; nothing can be added to it and nothing taken from it. God does it so that men will revere him.



... there is a time to mourn for those we love. i have mourned enough undeniably but how come... still... same....?

anyone who knows me would notice i live by my very faithful ipanemas sandals. they're just so confortable and nice, expensive too! but a pair of ipanemas is long lasting and worth every penny. however never had i imagined this day would arrive. my friggin dog bloody bit my ipanemas. it is broken. it is still in great condition - was hardly ever touched during the winter months.

GRRRRRRR...!!!! geram!

i can't even recall where i got my ipanemas few years ago. bloody hell.